Vincent the Vampire 2: Final Screwed Up Fantasy
by Crimson Moon
Summary: Since Vincent the Vampire seemed to do alright, I've decided to make a sequel. Read and review please! And beware, a little bit of Cloud bashing in the beginning...also, for all you sane people, stay away...stay very, VERY far away...
1. Cloud...gay?

Vincent the Vampire 2: Final Screwed Up Fantasy  
  
Disclaimer: ...I don't own ANYbody but...well...myself. The rest belong to Squaresoft.  
  
  
  
Author: *stands on a stage and waves* Hi! I'm the Author,  
  
Reno: *sitting in a seat in front of her and smirks* Steph, everybody knows that...  
  
Author: *scowls at Reno* well, you guys do...but the people reading this doesn't.  
  
Cloud: *also sitting in a seat in front of Steph* You mean the people outside the box?  
  
Steph: ...Right Cloud, good boy! *throws him a treat*  
  
Cloud: Yay!!!! *Catches and eats it*  
  
Reno: Jeez Steph, the people out there aren't illiterate...every time we talk our name's in front of it. I would think that if the name Author apeared in front of your sentence they would know you were the Author or they'd be completely stupid...  
  
Cloud: *blurts out* ...somebody could fake their name!  
  
Reno: *turns to Cloud* ...what?  
  
Cloud: yeah...you could be Tifa! All you'd have to do is have Reno in front of what you're saying and then they'd think you're Reno!  
  
Reno: Cloud...do I friggin look like Tifa??? Am I wearing a white tank top and a mini skirt???  
  
Red XIII: *walks in* Actually...you are...  
  
Reno: *slowly looks down and pales, Reno's Turk outfit is replaced by Tifa's AND he has boobs.* AHHHHHHH!!!! *tries hidding behind his chair*  
  
Steph: Ah...the power of being the author.  
  
*Tifa's voice is heard in another room* ACK! Where did my clothes go???  
  
*all the human men except for Reno, Vincent and Cloud perk up*  
  
Cid: $%*$...Tifa? No clothes?  
  
All human men except Reno, Vincent and Cloud: LET'S GO!!! *They all stampede out of the room obviously to Tifa's room.*  
  
Steph: *snaps her fingers and Tifa is clothed again, Reno also is normal* there ya go...  
  
*Cries of agony are heard, along with various martial arts sound affects*  
  
Tifa: HOW DARE YOU, YOU PERVERTS!!!!  
  
Reno: *checks the inside of his shirt and frowns,* damn it...  
  
Steph: Sooo...Cloud, why did you stay behind?  
  
Cloud: *grins nerviously* Wha? Why must you ask that question? That question that is hard to answer, because it is a hard question? Why?  
  
Steph: *shrugs* Well...I was just curious-  
  
Cloud: -IT is a hard question to answer...because it is so hard.  
  
Steph: *raises an eyebrow* ...Cloud? Why are you being suspicious?  
  
Cloud: *sweatdrops* ME? Suspicious? Noooo...I am not suspicious, because I am un-suspicious...  
  
Steph: Uh...  
  
Reno: He stayed behind because he's GAY! *laughs*  
  
Cloud: *bigger sweatdrop* ...No I'm not!!! I am not gay...I am un-gay!!! *looks around nerviously*  
  
Reno: *smirks* ADMIT it Strife, you're gay.  
  
Cloud: *cries out* Y-You have no proof!!! I am as straight as a wavy line!!!  
  
*Steph and Reno burst out laughing*  
  
Reno: You have no idea what you just said do you? heh...  
  
Steph: *trying to control laughter* heh...ok, Cloud, you want proof? Number one, you went into the group room with that Mukki guy...and you didn't complain that badly. Number two, you went on a date with Barret!!!!! I saw you spike his drink...  
  
Cloud: How did you know??? *sweat drops again*  
  
Steph: I was watching from outside of that 'box'...*points to the glass screen of the computer moniter*  
  
Dun Dun Dun!!!!!  
  
Reno: Good Gods...not this again...  
  
Cloud: STALKER!!!  
  
Steph: *smirks* Yeah, me and about a billion other people...  
  
Dun Dun Dun!!!!  
  
Cloud: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *pulls out his buster sword and begins chopping tables up feriously* DIE!!!  
  
Reno: Um...maybe you shouldn't have told him that...  
  
Steph: I think I agree with you.  
  
Reno: Soooooo....*scratches the back of his head* you wanna drink?  
  
Steph: *smiles* Sure.  
  
*Reno and Stephanie walk out leaving Cloud there by himself.*  
  
*Vincent emerges from the shadows, holding his cape open and showing his fangs*  
  
Cloud: *stops chopping* Vincent??  
  
Vincent: Hello...Clarice...I mean Cloud...*had been watching Silence of the Lambs earlier*  
  
Cloud: What are you doing here? *puts his sword back on his back*  
  
Vincent: ...I am hungry...  
  
Cloud: Ah, well, there's food in the back. *points to the kitchen*  
  
Vincent: You have misunderstood me, I am HUNGRY, hungry for blood. *smirks, showing off his teeth*  
  
Cloud: *shrugs* Whatever...hey, if you wanted blood...that would mean you'd be thirsty right? Blood is a liquid you know...  
  
Vincent: ... *frowns at Cloud*  
  
Cloud: ...what?  
  
Vincent: I have had it with your annoying behavior...*swoops down at Cloud*  
  
Cloud: ...well...crap.  
  
  
  
A/N ok! More to come later...right now I need sleep...ZzZz...please review also too...okies?? 


	2. The Return of Sephiroth!

Vincent the Vampire 2: Final Screwed Up Fantasy  
  
A/N Please read Vincent the Vampire 1 before reading anything! You'll probably get confused...  
  
Disclaimer: Like chapter one, I don't own anybody but myself...  
  
*Reno and Stephanie walk into the building, Stephanie is eating a cookie*  
  
Steph: I gots a cookie!! *grins* thank you zage the goth!  
  
*Reno is standing there, starring at something with a blank look on his face.* ...S-Steph...  
  
Steph: *dances around with the cookie* Yay!!  
  
Reno: QUIT EATING THE COOKIE AND LOOK!!! *Points at something*  
  
*Steph freezes*  
  
*Cloud is laying on the floor, bruised and bloody*  
  
Cloud: Ouchie...  
  
Reno: *walks over to him* ...whoa, you alright man?  
  
Cloud: *rolls his eyes* Oh yeah, I just love being beaten up and bitten...  
  
*Reno turns to Stephanie*  
  
Reno: Steph, you're the author...who did this?  
  
Steph: *shrugs* No clue.  
  
Reno: Quit lying!  
  
Steph: Alright, It's for me to know and for you to find out.  
  
*Barret walks in with a black eye, mutting something like 'Damn Tifa...'*  
  
*He freezes* Yo! What happened here?  
  
*The rest of the FF7 gang walk in and feeze*  
  
Cloud: *suddenly makes himself look weak* ...it was...V...V...urrrg.....*passes out*  
  
Steph: Cloud quit trying to be so dramatic...  
  
Cloud: *opens one eye* hey...I'm supposed to be dead here...don't talk to me...*closes it again*  
  
*Stephanie sighs* ...whatever...  
  
Reno: Now who starts with a V? ...Hmmm....  
  
Barret: ...Vicky?  
  
Cid: $%^& it must've been Vicky! Who else's name would start with a &%^&ing V?  
  
*Everyone shrugs, except for Steph*  
  
Steph: *turns to the people outside of the box*...funny...at school I feel stupid, now I feel as smart as Hojo...  
  
Everybody: VICKY MUST DIE!!!!  
  
*Vincent walks in, the cloth thing covering his mouth* hello...  
  
Yuffie: Oh, hey Vincent! We're out to kill Vicky, you wanna come?  
  
*Vincent shrugs* ...sure...why not...  
  
Tifa: Cloud, we will avenge you!  
  
Cloud: *thumbs up* Cool! Thanks!  
  
*Everyone stares*  
  
Cloud: ...um...I mean...*eyes turn into X's*  
  
*Suddenly, the windows break and in flies Sephiroth carrying a bag*  
  
Everybody: ACK!!! *everyone dodges out of the way*  
  
Reno: GODS!! Have you ever heard of a thing called a door!!! *gets up and brushes himself off*  
  
Sephiroth: *Floating in the air and shrugs* come on, you're no fun...  
  
Reno: *yells* Yeah, well I just so happen not like to be cut into peices by tiny shards of glass!!!  
  
*Sephiroth sighs* It's not my problem...  
  
Reno: Whad'ya mean it's not your problem??? What's wrong with you???  
  
Steph: Down Reno...  
  
*Reno whines like a puppy and calms down*  
  
Steph: Good, please don't fight. Sephiroth is ALSO one of my favorites you know...  
  
Tifa: Sephiroth?!...I thought Cait Sith knocked you over the cliff!  
  
Sephiroth: *laughs* Ah, stupid Tifa. It's called F-L-Y-I-N-G. And don't worry, I am now Pacifist....again... *he grins and pulls out the bag* Behold...Cait Sith number 3!!! *Turns the bag upside down and the Cait Sith falls out onto to the floor, crashing into a million peices*  
  
*Silence*  
  
Sephiroth: *sweat drops*...um...oops...sorry about that. *Lands*  
  
Steph: ...Ahem...Alright people outside of the box! Will our hero's find cruel Vicky and destroy her? Is Sephiroth REALLY Pacifist? Will Reno kill Sephiroth? Will there be a Cait Sith number 4? Or will they fix Cait sith number 3? Can that be done? Will they need a lot of tape to tape it up, if it can be done? Is Tifa really a woman?  
  
Tifa: HEY!  
  
Steph: Hehe...If Sephiroth is alive, does that mean Aeris will come back? Does-  
  
Reno: ALRIGHT! Just shut up!!!  
  
Steph: *sticks her tongue out* Whatever Reno...anyway, find out on the next chapter of...  
  
VINCENT THE VAMPIRE 2!  
  
***TO BE CONTINUED***  
  
Yuffie: Whew...finally... 


	3. Lethal...

Vincent the Vampire 2: Final Screwed Up Fantasy  
  
Disclaimer: Why do I have to keep doing disclaimers?? Bite me if you don't want me using Final Fantasy VII characters Squaresoft!!! Just...don't bite too hard...please?  
  
  
  
Cid: $%^*$@&#% Sephiroth... #@%^*%@@#2...%^*%&$%$#!........................@#^@%.....................%#$ $#.  
  
Sephiroth: I said I was sorry...  
  
Cid: #$%$&@$.....#$@#^&^$%@%#^$#, Fine ya @$$! I'll go fix the $%^&*@$ thing...  
  
Steph: Cid! Watch your mouth! This is supposed to be rated PG...  
  
Cid: *scooping up the Cait Sith pieces* ...sorry Steph....#%$@...  
  
*Stephanie shakes her head* Maybe I should raise the rating...  
  
Vincent: Perhaps you should.  
  
Steph: Whatever, its not like small 2 year olds are going to be watching.  
  
Red XIII: ...er...Stephanie...look behind you...  
  
Steph: ...? *glances behind her and sees about ten 2 year olds looking curiously at her* ...uh...  
  
Cid: $*#%!!!!!  
  
*The 2 year olds laugh and repeat Cid* ...$*#%!  
  
Steph: ACK! I could get sued! Sephiroth, get them outta here!  
  
*there is no responce*  
  
Steph: *looks around* Sephy?  
  
*Sephiroth is hanging onto the ceiling, whimpering as if the 2 year olds were spiders.* GET THEM AWAY FROM ME!!!  
  
*the little kids smile inoccently* ...$*#%!  
  
Sephiroth: EEK! Their cuteness is lethal!!  
  
*Everyone laughs*  
  
Reno: Come on Sephiroth...they're completely harmless... *Suddenly one of them pull Reno's nightstick from his pocket*  
  
Little kid: $*#%! *he smiles happily and turns it on*  
  
Reno: Heh...hey, you wanna become a Turk little guy?  
  
*The little kid nods.* $*#%!!  
  
Rude: ...he's got the cussing part down already.  
  
*The sound of what sounds like a little girl screaming is heard*  
  
Reno: AAAAAAHHHHHHRRRRRRRGGGGGGGG!!!!! *is being electricuted by the boy, who's laughing*  
  
Rude: ...and the violence part.  
  
Little kid: $*#%!! $*#%!!  
  
*Reno collapses to the ground, twitching*  
  
Steph: *winces*...that's gotta hurt...  
  
Reno: s-s-s-s...s-s-stupid....K-K-KID!!! *Eyes twitching*  
  
Sephiroth: *still on the ceiling and calls out,* I TOLD YOU THEY WERE LETHAL!  
  
*Stephanie waves her hand and all the children are gone except the one with the nightstick*  
  
Steph: Allllllright...what are we going to name this kid?  
  
Reno: NO! *stands up* Get rid of that brat!!  
  
Steph: Reno...you're so cruel...he's just a child! I'm sure he's sorry, aren't you kid?  
  
*The 2 year old turns on the nightstick again and smiles*  
  
Tifa: awwww...so sweet! *scoops the kid up into her arms and nuzzles his nose*  
  
Reno: ...why doesn't anybody ever listen to me? WHY?  
  
Steph: Reno, calm down dude....  
  
*Sephiroth screams* HE'S LETHAL!!! AHHHHH!!!!  
  
Yuffie: *blurts out* Let's name him Lethal!  
  
Cid: $^$#&^&^*$#@#!%@....what kid of $%@*ing name is that Yuffie? $%#*!  
  
Yuffie: well..it describes him...doesn't it?  
  
Cid: #%*$^!@$%$#%%%$@%#$@#$!@$#@%!#$....I guess.  
  
Lethal: #%*$^!@$%$#%%%$@%#$@#$!@$#@%!#$ !!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
*everybody stares at Lethal*  
  
*Steph scowls at Cid* Cid, I said stop cussing!  
  
Cid: %^*#...sorry Steph, I- *soap suddenly apears in is mouth and he gags* Muff!! Muuuuf!!!  
  
*Stephanie wipes her hands together* There we go...  
  
*Cid spits it out* YUCK! Why did you do that you AS-  
  
Steph: STOP! ...What happened to the symbols?  
  
Cid: I don't fuc-  
  
Steph: Shut up Cid! Don't say a word...*Cid's mouth disapears*  
  
Cid: !!!!!!!!!  
  
Steph: There we go...Red, how much does a censered thing cost?  
  
Red XIII: ...since this is such a low budget fic, we'll have to save up our gil for a while.  
  
Cid: *shakes his head franticly* !!!!!!!  
  
*Steph frowns* DAM- ...I mean, darn, that means Cid won't be able to talk for a while...sorry Cid. I'm just too lazy to raise the rating.  
  
*Cid begins crying, because he can't smoke since his mouth is gone.*  
  
*Lethal is turning the nightstick on and off, over and over again*  
  
Reno: *annoyed*...GIVE ME THAT! *Grabs for it, but Lethal pokes Reno, electricuting him again*  
  
Yuffie: ...aren't we supposed to be searching for this Vicky person?  
  
Tifa: ...yeah...lets do that in chapter 4!  
  
***TO BE CONTINUED***  
  
Yuffie: Goshness...we're not getting very far are we? 


	4. Van...Gogh?...

Vincent the Vampire 2: Final Screwed Up Fantasy (By now I think you know what the title is...)  
  
Disclaimer: whatever...I don't own anybody but myself, the little kid, and this mysterious Vicky everyone talks about. *sighs* The rest, sadly, belong to Squarsoft. I'm not getting paid for this either...scratch that...I get paid cookies for this...  
  
Steph: Welcome back! We now have, 2 gil! Soon we'll be able to buy a cesured beeping thing! *Bites into one of her cookies*  
  
*Everyone cheers*  
  
Reno: *Sarcasticly* Wow, we're so rich...2 gil...whoo hoo...  
  
Steph: Silence pethetic scum! *Waves her hand*  
  
*Tape magicly wraps around Reno's mouth*  
  
Reno: MMMMM!!! Mufff!!!!!!*Tries pulling it off*  
  
*Stephanie frowns and takes pity on him*  
  
Steph: Alright, promise me you wont be a smart as- I mean...jack as- ...um, a jerk...and I'll take the dam- darn...thing off...  
  
*Reno nods, and the tape dissapears*  
  
Reno: *breathing for air* *Huff...huff*...Steph...why don't you just raise the rating? That way we'll be able to cuss all we want AND you wont have to buy a cesured beeping thing...  
  
*Stephanie scowls at Reno and points at Lethal, who's sitting there inoccently and playing with the nightstick*  
  
Steph: I don't want to encourage him to cuss...he's only 2.  
  
*Reno laughs, and then smirks* HA! He already knows about every cussword in the book...thank Cid for that.  
  
*Cid is sitting on the ground, trying to smoke a cigarette from his nose since his mouth is still gone. Apon hearing his name he turns and looks at everyone, then shrugs.*  
  
Steph: ....wellll then...where were we?  
  
Reno: I have something to ask you Steph, why the HELL-  
  
Steph: RENO!  
  
Reno: ...oops...  
  
Lethal: HELL!  
  
Reno: anyway, why the heck do we have to name the brat Lethal? What kind of name is that???  
  
*Cid nods*  
  
Sephiroth: *still hanging from the ceiling* IT FITS HIM!!  
  
Reno: ...well, true...but that's the stupidest name I've ever heard apart from Bugenhagen...  
  
Red XIII: Don't insult grandfather!!  
  
Steph: Well Reno, may I add that YOUR name means reindeer in spanish?  
  
Reno: *raises an eyebrow* What? ...No it doesn't!  
  
Steph: *nods* Yup, it does...go check a spanish/english dictionary.  
  
Reno: Fine! I'll be right back...*leaps out of Fanfiction.net and runs to Google to search for an online spanish dictionary*  
  
Yuffie: *laughs* Yay! You got rid of him!  
  
*Steph shrugs* I didn't mean to...what I said was true.  
  
Yuffie: Really? Yeah right! Who would name their son reindeer?  
  
Steph: Apparently his mother...  
  
Yuffie: I've got to see this for myself! *Leaps out of Fanficion.net and runs to Yahoo for a spanish dictionary.*  
  
*Steph sighs and waits for them to return*  
  
*Reno jumps back into Fanfiction.net*  
  
Reno: No way! Do I honestly LOOK like a reindeer? *thinks about what he just says and waits for Steph to turn him into one. Once he realizes she's not going to he sighs with relief*  
  
*Yuffie comes back laughing*  
  
Yuffie: AHAHA!!  
  
Reno: Shut up! It's not funny!  
  
Steph: Um...Rudolph the Reindeer had a red nose...and, well...you don't have a red nose BUT you have red hair...  
  
Reno: *As red as his hair in anger* If my mom was still alive, I'd kill her!  
  
Lethal: Reno gots a stupid name! *waves the nightstick in the air* Hehe!  
  
Tifa: Everybody, lets forget about Reno's name and hunt down Vicky!  
  
Vincent: I agree...that way, you'll never know that I- *cuts himself off and sweatdrops*  
  
Cid: ...? *shrugs and continues smoking through his nose*  
  
Reno: Fine...*calms down* alright, does anybody here know a Vicky?  
  
Steph: I do...she was in my drama class.  
  
Yuffie: Did you ever put on a play called....Dracula?  
  
Dun Dun Dun!  
  
Steph: *rolls her eyes* Gods I have to get rid of that thing...anyway...no, we didn't.  
  
Yuffie: *eyeing Stephanie suspiciously* ...are you SURE?  
  
Steph: Yes I'm sure, it couldn't of been her anyway.  
  
Yuffie: Why not??  
  
Steph: ...what is this? 20 questions? Since when have you become a detective?  
  
Yuffie: but...her name is Vicky! Cloud said the person who attacked him started with a V! Who, other than Vicky, starts with a V? And who, other than Vicky, would do such a thing?  
  
*Vincent starts to back up, thinking he might get figured out*  
  
Yuffie: ....hmmm...VINCENT!  
  
Vincent: GAH! I didn't do it! I'm not a vampire remember??? *presses against the wall*  
  
Yuffie: ...all I was going to do was ask you your opinion...  
  
Vincent: *relieved, and straightens up* Well...o-of course, it was either Vicky or...or...Van...Gogh.  
  
Steph: What? *laughs* Van Gogh has been dead for a while...and he was an artist, not a vampire.  
  
Vincent: Ah, think about it Stephanie, he cut off his ears!  
  
Steph: ...and?  
  
Vincent: AND....that means he's...dagerous?  
  
Steph: AND he's dead.  
  
Vincent: Aren't vampires dead too?...  
  
Steph: *shrugs* I guess it depends.  
  
Vincent: WAIT! Van Gogh has a coffin...  
  
Steph: BECAUSE he's dead!  
  
Reno: Jeez, lets just stick with Vicky...  
  
Yuffie: Yeah, come on guys...why would a dead artist come after Cloud? Final Fantasy VII wasn't even out in his time....  
  
Vincent: Maybe he wasn't a vampire...maybe he was a zombie who accidently stabbed Cloud with his paint brush...  
  
Everybody: ...  
  
Vincent: What? It was just a suggestion...  
  
Steph: Grrr...whatever Vincent...oh by the way, before we go on the search for Vicky, a person named Andreah has some stuff for some of you , and cookies for me *Waves at Andreah* Thank you! *Turns to Reno* Ok Reno, you first.  
  
Reno: ...?  
  
*Steph tosses him the nifty/spiffy/trippy carrying case* *Reno opens it and grins*  
  
Reno: Dude!!! A new nightstick! Cool! *faces the people outside of the box and calls out* THANKS!!!! And only I can use it! TAKE THAT LETHAL!  
  
*Lethal giggles, and pokes him with the nightstick, electricuting him again*  
  
Reno: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGG!!!!  
  
Steph: *laughs* alright...CID! You're next.  
  
*Cid looks up, lighting another ciggarett and sticking it in his nose*  
  
Steph: ...gross...well anway, here. *Tosses him a notepad and a pen*  
  
*Cid grins, and begins writing something at once. When he finishes it, he holds it up for Steph to see*  
  
Cid: "When I get my mouth back, I'm gonna cuss your sorry @$$ out, then I'm gonna beat the $%^# outta ya! You #$%@er!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
Steph: Hey, at least he bothered to write the symbols out...  
  
Barret: Yo, can we kill Vicky now? I'm bored...ya know? I jus' wanna get on with it!  
  
Steph: Alright alright! We'll do that in the next chapter...*Bites into her second cookie* *Munch munch*  
  
*Sounds of booing are heard*  
  
*Steph rolls her eyes* whatever...  
  
***TO BE CONTINUED***  
  
Yuffie: How long will the insanity continue???  
  
Steph: Muwahaha... 


	5. Attack of the Beep!

Vincent the Vampire 2: Final Screwed Up Fantasy  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own anybody but myself, Lethal, the Vicky person, and Amanda...actually I don't own her...she owns herself.  
  
  
  
Steph: ALRIGHT people, let's get this over with!!!  
  
Princess Bemidia: HOLD IT!  
  
*Everyone looks to a blonde haired girl standing in the doorway*  
  
Steph: Princess Bemidia?? What are you doing here???  
  
Princess Bemidia: ...Steph, do you have to call me Princess Bemidia? Why don't you just call me Amanda like you've been doing for the past 4 years?  
  
Steph: Hmm...true, less typing is involved.  
  
Amanda: ...  
  
Steph: Anyway, answer my question!  
  
Amanda: I came here to tell everyone who REALLY killed Cloud! It was Vi-  
  
Steph: BEEP!  
  
Amanda: ??? ...what's the beep for?  
  
Steph: Well.I only have 2 gil and a bunch of cookies...so I can't really afford a censured beeping thing. I'm going to be doing the beeping for now on...  
  
*Reno grins mischievously...*  
  
*Cid also grins...or would be grinning if he had a mouth...and writes something on his notepad*  
  
Cid: "Are you going to give me my f*cking mouth back then?" *holds it up for her to see*  
  
Steph: *Scratches chin* hmmm...I'll think about it.  
  
*Cid narrows his eyes at her, and pulls out another cigarette, sticking into his nostril.*  
  
Yuffie: ...ewww...that's gotta be bad for you.  
  
*He shrugs and sniffs in*  
  
Amanda: You're so pathetic Stephanie. *She yells* EVERYBODY, IT WAS VI-  
  
Steph: -CKY!  
  
Vincent: everyone knows it was Vicky...*Grins at their idiocy*  
  
*Amanda shoots him a glare, then suddenly blinks, seeing it's Vincent himself*  
  
Amanda: IT'S VINCENT!!!  
  
Vincent: er...yes...that would be me...  
  
Amanda: You're my muse!!!  
  
Vincent: ...I am? What are you talking about? I don't even know you!  
  
Amanda: Of course you do, you live with me.  
  
Vincent: ...um...actually I live in the Shinra Mansion.  
  
Rufus: Actually, I dumped all of your stuff out. I live there now.  
  
Dun Dun Dun!!  
  
*GASP!!!*  
  
Vincent: ...WHAT? ... *his face turns even paler than it was before...if that's possible.*  
  
*Stephanie scratches the back of her head and looks down* well...um...you see...I signed a contract with Amanda saying that you'll live with her...  
  
Vincent: And what do YOU get for this?!  
  
Steph: Exactly one cookie.  
  
*Vincent stares at her for 10 minutes, then finally screams* WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT????????  
  
Steph: Rufus wanted the house, Amanda wanted you, and I wanted a cookie! See? It works out just fine!  
  
Vincent: Did you ever think about what I WANT??????  
  
Steph: Don't worry Vince; Amanda won't rape you or anything...I hope...  
  
*In the background Amanda starts whistling and looking at the ceiling*  
  
Amanda: This ceiling is quite interesting...  
  
Steph: All will turn out good...just watch out for her psychotic brother.  
  
*Vincent faints*  
  
Amanda: Aw!! Look what you did Stephanie!  
  
*Steph shrugs* He'll live...  
  
Amanda: Actually...he's much cuter asleep...  
  
Steph: Save it for later...anyway, how about everyone give a warm welcome to Rufus?  
  
*Booing is heard*  
  
*The sound of a gun going off is heard and everyone is silent. There's a hole in the ceiling where Steph is pointing a pistol with smoke coming out of it*  
  
Steph: Wanna try that again?  
  
*Cheering is heard*  
  
Rufus: ...thank you...  
  
Sephiroth: AHHH! You almost shot me!!!!  
  
*Steph looks up at Sephiroth, who is STILL on the ceiling* Sorry about that Seph...how about you come down?  
  
*Sephiroth shakes his head franticly, trying to point to Lethal, but almost falling.*  
  
Steph: I'll give you a cookie!!!  
  
*He thinks about it, and then flies down, grabbing the cookie and shoving it into his mouth* *Munch Munch*  
  
Steph: There! Now we can go on our quest for Vicky!  
  
Amanda: There is no Vi- Steph: -ncent!  
  
*Cid holds up notepad* "What the he11 are you talkin' about??? He's laying right there!!!" *points to Vincent*  
  
Amanda: Grrrr!!!  
  
*Steph snickers* Alright, let's go! *Is just about to walk out of the door when Reno pops up*  
  
Reno: Hey, Steph!  
  
Steph: What?  
  
Reno: As-  
  
Steph: Beep!  
  
*Reno grins* Fuc-  
  
Steph: Beep!  
  
Reno: Shi-  
  
Steph: Beep! Quit Reno! You're doing it on purpose!  
  
Reno: Exactly...Dam-  
  
Steph: Beep!!!  
  
Reno: Son of a Bi-  
  
Steph: BEEP!! Stop it!!!!!  
  
*Reno is laughing his as-*  
  
Steph: BEEP! *pant pant*  
  
*-...off.*  
  
*Reno lets out a whole lot of cuss words now* Fuc- you, you mother fuc-ing bitc-  
  
Steph: Beep! *Pants* ...Beep! ...Beep...*pant pant pant*  
  
Reno: O- *Is hit upside the head by Amanda*  
  
Amanda: Quit! You're giving her a heart attack you as-  
  
Steph: ...beep...*falls over*  
  
Reno: All I was going to say was 'Ok, I'll stop now!' bitc-  
  
Steph: ....beeee...eeep.....*passes out*  
  
Reno: Uh...oops...I guess we're going to have to wait until the next chapter to find Vicky...*shakes Steph*  
  
Steph: ....beeeeeeeep...hehehe...  
  
*Amanda pours ice water on Vincent*  
  
Vincent: *eyes open* GAH!!!  
  
***TO BE CONTINUED*** 


End file.
